MADISON, WISCONSIN – As the uncertainty around the November 3rd election grows, a man who posed, what he thought, was a rhetorical question in 2016 nearly has his answer.
“How bad could it possibly get?” was the question posed by Mark Young to his friend as she cried inconsolably after the final tally of the 2016 election.
“I was honestly just trying to make her feel better. I mean, at the time I had tons of confidence that the American system could sustain four years of a corrupt, incompetent Cheeto but it really feels like I might get my question answered.”
When asked why he considers this to be such a dire situation, Mr. Young elaborated.
“So just to sum up the situation, we’re in the middle of what has proven to be a somewhat preventable pandemic, as a band-aid we’ve watered down our money supply by printing $6 trillion dollars, our rival, China is thriving and making people see the bright side of choking personal liberties out of life and now we have an election, a referendum on the guy who put us here, and we have armed militias lining up to scare away those who want to vote him out,” he continued.
“Not to mention our largest companies being incentivized to capitalize on the country’s mental decay. Oh and did I mention the entire west side of our country was on fire for a month?”
“Plus Tom Hanks got Coronavirus! AND Eddie Van Halen died. I mean what the FUCK?”